Breaking the Barrier

Within the past year, my family moved to a new place.  We had lived in the place before for nearly my whole life, and I had some really, really good friends there.  I was all for this move, and I don't regret it in the least.  I love where I'm at, and I wouldn't change it for the world.  Being the 'new girl' at the age of 13 is super difficult.  The girls here already have their groups of friends, because they've grown up together. Plus, being homeschooled is kind of a disadvantage.  Don't get me wrong; I love homeschooling, and I definitely wouldn't change it.  It's just extra difficult, because I only see the girls at dance, and the 'socialization period' is very short; before and after dance for maybe 10 or 15 minutes at the most.  How do I become 'involved' with these girls' lives?  How do I make friends?  It is really difficult for me, because I am very shy.  I know that being shy can be taken the wrong way sometimes.  What if they think I'm stuck up?  What if they think that I think I'm better than them?  I don't want that at all.  I just want to be friends with them.  I'm really, really trying to create conversation, but what do I talk about?  What do we have in common besides dance and skiing?  I don't know.  I'd like to ski with them, but most of the girls don't ski where I do.  I try to smile, say 'hello' and 'goodbye', wave, make friendly gestures.  My mom keeps encouraging me to be friendly, and talk, but it's just so hard.  It's so hard to figure out how to break the barrier.  Sometimes a lot of times, it gets lonely.  I have my friends from where I used to live, and I keep in touch, but it's not like I can just hang out on the weekends.  This is one of the reasons that I love blogging so much.  You guys are my friends.  Even though I haven't met you in person, face-to-face, you are my friends.  I hope you feel the same way.  So, once again, the question comes back, lurking constantly in the back of my mind.  How do I break that barrier?  How do I ask if they want to hang out sometime? How do I ask that without it being totally awkward?  I. Don't. Know.  I need your help.  Have you ever been in a situation like this?  How did you get through it?  Can you give me some tips?


  1. I am pretty much in the same situation as you! I just started in a homeschool PE and am making some firends but it is hard to make friends! I think of you as an online buddy too! :)

    1. It is really hard to make friends. What's homeschool PE? It sounds like a good way to get to know people! I'm glad you think of me as a friend, too! :D

  2. I can relate to this so much. Although I've lived in the same house my whole life, in 2011 I had to switch schools. I was fine then, but this year there were tons of new people, and it seemed like they all knew each other and became friends right away. It was hard for me to talk to them, because I had no idea what to say. I was called shy, and quiet for so long, but eventually I just had to put myself in there. Now I can pretty easily ask questions and tell them things about my life. Don't worry, just try hard, talk to God, and things will get better.

    xx emma

    1. Switching schools sounds really difficult. Thank you for your advice. :) I just don't want to make them feel uncomfortable. What if they don't want to hang out? Ugh. It's so difficult. Again, thank you for your advice! :)

  3. I know, getting to know people is super tough, especially if they already have their own 'groups'. My swim team is very tightly knit, and sometimes that's tough for new people. But hang in there! Maybe talk to them at dance, and just ask them about themselves. Haha! Yes, if you must know I HAVE played the 'what's your favorite color' card. :P Sometimes it takes time. I'm sure anyone would be glad to have you for a close friend!! Sorry this comment is so long. :P Hope I helped a little,

    Your friend,

    1. When they already have their groups, it is so hard! Asking them about themselves is a good idea. Thank you so much for your complement. :) You are so sweet! I wish I could meet you in person. :) I love your long comments! Not to worry!



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